Waging WAR on Ignorance, Intolerance & Injustice!
“I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up – they have no holidays.” — Henny Youngman
(Ba-dum-tsss! Cute, but not true. Most atheists, and agnostics, celebrate just about every holiday. They just don’t see them as *holy*. To them they’re just wonderful excuses for family gatherings and merriment. They love just like anyone who claims to be religious. Be well and do good, friends.) — YUR
Image courtesy of Google
“The first part of our marriage was happy. But then, on the way back from the ceremony . . . ” — Henny Youngman
(LOL! Hilarious! They don’t make them like Henny anymore. Of course all of today’s comedians pretty much have to walk on egg shells every time they do their routines. Somebody is bound to take offense to some of the jokes. Some would argue that this is progress, but I disagree. The world needs more laughter. Be well and do good, friends.) — YUR
Image courtesy of Google
“I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.” — Henny Youngman
(Classic borscht belt humor! Borrowed and adapted by Rodney Dangerfield and others. Be well and do good, friends.) — YUR
“I wish my brother-in-law would learn a trade, so we’d know what kind of work he was out of.” — Henny Youngman
Dan Rowan and Dick Martin as caricatured for NBC by Sam Berman (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
(“Take my wife . . . please!” The King of the One-Liners! Henny was a very funny comedian and a tireless performer. His career lasted well over 70 years! One of the things that always cracked me up was simply his name. Of course, Henny itself is pretty unusual, but it was his last name, Youngman, that always struck me funny. He was already 51 years old, by the time I was born, and he was probably 62 before I really knew who he was. My first recollection of him was, in all likelihood, from Rowan and Martin‘s Laugh-In. I might have seen him on The Merv Griffin Show, or The Mike Douglas Show, before then, but definitely on Laugh-In! So, to a 10 year old kid, how is this old geezer a young man??? But of course, now I’m well into my 50s, and I don’t consider myself an old man! But, that just shows how perspectives tend to change. Be well and do good, friends.) — YUR
KNUSPER! Die 3 Glorreichen 7 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
“I just played a horse yesterday that was so slow the jockey kept a diary of the trip.” — Henny Youngman
(Funny and clean! I don’t have a problem with the occasional F-bomb and assorted cursing. Many great comedians play blue. But, there’s a whole world of funny out there that can get by without it. Be well and do good, friends.) — YUR
VIOLIN (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
“I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up: they have no holidays.” — Henny Youngman
(I guess if you look at it from the standpoint of the origins of the word he’s right! Holiday comes from holy day. Of course, there are plenty of secular “holidays” these days, but it’s still amusing. Be well and do good, friends.) — YUR
PS. Zemanta was only giving me Getty owned pics of Henny, so all I can show you is this violin. — YUR
“If you’re going to do something tonight that you’ll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.” — Henny Youngman
(If only it were that simple! Actually, if that night involves imbibing . . . and you don’t have to get up for work . . . Hey, why not? Be well and do good, friends.) — YUR
English: Contemporary cuckoo clock designed by Pascal Tarabay for the Italian design firm of furniture and home accessories, Diamantini & Domeniconi. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Cuckoo clock, a so-called Jagdstück (Hunt piece), Black Forest, ca. 1900, Deutsches Uhrenmuseum, Inv. 2006-013 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
“Have I got a mother-in-law — she’s so neat she puts paper under the cuckoo clock.” — Henny Youngman
(A little tricky. I thought I might have made a mistake when I started writing out the Os. Not a lot of words end in OO. But, it all came together to form the King of the One Liners funny quote. All that’s missing is a rimshot! Be well and do good, friends.) — YUR
Henny Youngman (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
“When I told my doctor I couldn’t afford an operation, he offered to touch up my x-rays.” — Henny Youngman
(Patient: Hey, Doc. It hurts when I do this. Doctor: Then don’t do that. I think that was another of Henny’s. Be well and do good, friends.) — YUR
Image by Larry He's So Fine via Flickr
“The Income Tax people are very nice. They’re letting me keep my own mother.” — Henny Youngman
(How is this our first Henny Youngman quote??? Brainy Quote has three pages of his stuff! Let’s see some more humorous/comedic quotations! Be well and do well, friends.) — YUR
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